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Most girls have at least one male friend in their life who they’ve known for some time, and at some point, it crosses their mind, “does he like me more than a friend?” Is he pining for you like a lost Labrador puppy, or are you firmly in the friendzone?
Maybe you’re recent office buddies or have been best friends for years, and you’re starting to feel that the friendly vibes are transitioning into something more. Perhaps he looks at you just a little longer than he used to, or your conversations are getting flirtier each day. But it’s often tricky to know if it’s harmless banter or if there are genuine deeper feelings there. You probably don’t feel comfortable talking about it with him or even your girlfriends just in case it gets back to him, and you’ve got the total wrong end of the stick. It’s not worth ruining your friendship over.
So, in this article, I’ve put together an extensive list of signs he secretly likes you more than a friend.
Does he like me more than a friend? 27 signs he likes you more than a friend
1. You catch him looking at you
One of the first signs a guy likes you more than a friend is if his eyes seem always to be locked on you, whether you’re sitting next to each other at work or across the room at a party. If it appears lately, whenever you look over at him, he is already looking at you or quickly diverts his gaze and turns a shade of bubblegum pink; he might like you more than a friend. Either that or he’s in some weird never-ending staring contest with you that he doesn’t want you to know about!
Men are very visual creatures and naturally focus on the person they are most attracted to in a room.
2. He likes all of your social media posts
Granted, social media is not real life. But if a guy is following you on all platforms and makes a conscious effort to like and comment on all your posts, join any groups or events you create, watch your stories, and slide into your DMs; there’s a strong chance he is crushing on you. Especially if he’s always sending you fire and heart emojis 🔥😍.
3. His body language says he likes you as more than a friend
It’s easy to control what we say and do, but our body language often gives our true feelings away without us realizing it.
For example, you might say you’re happy to be in a team meeting at 5.30 PM on a Friday, but the fact that you’ve had your arms crossed the entire time and haven’t smiled once at your boss’s crummy jokes signals that you would rather be anywhere else.
Body language signals that he likes you more than a friend:
- He makes regular eye contact
- He smiles at you
- He positions his body toward you
- His body language mirrors yours
- He stands up taller
- He touches you (in a non-creepy way)
4. He’s always happy to see you
The next time you’re wondering, “does he like me more than a friend?” pay attention to his energy when he’s with you. A man who lights up, smiles, laughs, and is generally in a positive mood when you’re with him is a man who is probably happy to see you. On the other hand, if his mood is always the same and he doesn’t act any differently around you, he might see you as a friend. And there is a chance he’s just a super happy guy, but in my experience, no one is that happy all the time!
5. He laughs a lot around you
A Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin study reported that laughing at a person’s joke might be a deep-rooted sign of attraction. So, if the guy in question is constantly laughing at your jokes, and you know you’re no comedian, he might be attracted to you. The real test is if he laughs at your jokes more than others, especially his guy friends. A guy laughing with you a lot is a sign he finds it enjoyable and comfortable to be around you.
6. He teases you
Do you remember in school how if a boy liked you, he would often tease you? Boys don’t grow up that much (not that you need me to tell you that). Teasing in a brilliant way to flirt as a kid and as an adult, just as long as he’s not taking the joke too far! You’ll giggle and feel closer to one another, and that’s his aim. Just remember to give as good as you get.
7. He’s interested in you
When I say interested, I mean he is curious about who you are and what makes you tick. He might ask you about your dreams, passions, family, fears, and thoughts on lobster tacos. A guy who likes you more than a friend wants to know everything about you and how he can support and please you.
If it turns out you’re into lobster tacos just as much as he is, don’t be surprised if he whisks you away for lunch on your break and introduces you to the most scrumptious tacos you’ve ever eaten!
8. You make him nervous
If you’re dealing with a shy guy, the alternative to him always being happy and smiley around you is someone who constantly seems nervous, on edge, anxious, shifty, awkward, and maybe a little uncomfortable. If he’s like that all the time with everyone, it isn’t easy to gauge whether he has caught feelings. But if he’s only like this around you, there’s a high probability that he likes you more than a friend.
9. He always asks for your opinion
When a man asks for your opinion, it’s because he values your thoughts and appreciates getting your expertise on issues in his life. Now, if you’re good friends with someone and have known them for a long time, it’s normal to talk serious matters through with them and get their two cents.
So, how do you know if it’s more than a friendly thing? Pay attention to what he’s asking your opinion on. If it’s things he doesn’t really need your opinion on, like what color suit he should wear to his friend’s wedding or what type of sandwich he should get for lunch, he’s probably just coming up with excuses to talk to you because he likes you!
10. He initiates contact
Does he often text you out of the blue to say hi, send you funny memes, and even double text you when you haven’t had time to reply?
One of the subtle signs he likes you more than a friend is if he calls you rather than just texting you or messaging you on social media. Calling is becoming something of a dying art. The next generation doesn’t even understand the concept of a phone that is not a cellphone 😂. So if he’s making an effort to pick up the phone, it’s either because he’s old school and still doesn’t know how to text or because you mean something to him.
11. He doesn’t leave you waiting to hear from him
The only time ghosting has ever been romantic was with Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore. And a guy who likes you more than a friend will never ghost you. In fact, he’s probably reaching out to you more than you reach out to him. He’s waiting on your replies and stopping what he’s in the middle of to respond – men and women who are just friends don’t typically do this.
12. He talks to you differently
Does he like you as a friend or more? If you’re not sure, consider how he acts around others compared to you. For example, is he typically a macho alpha male with his buddies but comes across as much softer when he’s with you? And how does he act with other women compared to you? If he’s regularly displaying the body language signals I touched on earlier when he’s with you but not with other women, there’s a chance you’re special to him.
13. He compliments you
When a guy likes you more than a friend, he will notice and like more things about you than the average person and want to share those things with you. And it won’t just be physical compliments, either. A guy who is attracted to you is more likely to compliment you on something non-physical. If he’s trying to be discrete, he might tell you that your presentation at work was great or that you handled a situation with your friends well.
14. He invites you places as his plus one
Are you always the one who gets the call to be his plus one at a dinner party or a friend’s wedding? And when you’re out together, people may often mistake you for a couple.
A man who sees you as just a good friend might invite you to be his plus one on the odd occasion, but if you’re regularly showing up by his side, it’s probably because he wants you by his side for the long run.
15. You’ve met his nearest and dearest
Would you invite a guy you barely know or care about to meet your closest friends and family members?
Heck no!
Similarly, a guy will not introduce you to his inner circle unless he feels close to you, is proud of you, and sees you in his future. If he’s going out of his way to bring you into his world and is eager to know if you like his nearest and dearest, this is a clear sign he likes you more than just a friend.
16. He knows you better than most people
Does it feel like this guy knows you better than most people in your life, except your best friend? He pays attention to the tiniest details like your favorite song, your irrational fear of cheddar, the holiday season you love most, and the exact way you like your oat latte at Starbucks. And he notices when something about you changes like you get a new hairstyle or you’re feeling down about something. The less time he has known you, the more impressive this is, and the more likely it is that he likes you more than a friend.
17. He makes an effort to show you that you’re a priority
When you hang out together, does he always go the extra mile? For example, he picks you up and drops you back at your place, he is happy to meet you somewhere close to you after work, so you don’t have to travel, you turn up at the restaurant, and your favorite drink is sitting there for you, or he puts effort into choosing an activity he knows you’ll love. This is him showing you that you matter to him.
18. He’s willing to drop everything for you
Have you ever had an emergency, like when you read an article that said Love Island was being canceled or Whole Foods discontinued your favorite almond butter? Okay, it’s usually something a little more pressing than this. But no question asked this guy is there for you at the drop of a hat. He wants to ensure you’re okay and will go out of his way to make everything right again.
19. He invests in you
I don’t just mean money here; I mean time, energy, and yes, money. Usually, with friends, you’ll go dutch for things or take turns to treat each other, and you don’t go above and beyond to “woo” each other. So if this guy is constantly stepping things up a notch, won’t let you pay for anything, and devotes a significant amount of his free time and attention to you, this strongly indicates that he likes you more than a friend.
20. He makes regular one-on-one plans with you
Does he see you as a friend or more? Well, think about how often you hang out with him as part of a group versus on his own. A guy who sees you as a friend won’t hang out with you one on one much. But a guy who is attracted to you more deeply will want you all to himself. So if he’s regularly arranging to see you one-on-one, he might have caught feelings.
21. He’s consistent
In my exclusive dating program Love Accelerator, I share my trust formula with women. It goes like this:
Trust level = Consistency x time.
The more consistent a man is and the longer you’ve known him, the more you can trust him. And this applies to anyone, whether you’re dating them or not.
If a man consistently shows up for you and gives you unwavering attention, he may see you as more than a friend.
22. He never talks about other women
This goes for ghosts of girlfriends past, women he’s currently dating, or any celebrity he thinks is beautiful – unless, of course, he thinks you look like said celebrity. In that case, he’ll tell you he thinks you look like her and make sure you know that he thinks she’s attractive, i.e., he thinks you’re attractive.
If he’s into you, he’s likely to avoid the dating question altogether or tell you he’s holding out for someone special.
23. And he doesn’t like it when you talk about other guys
If you’re currently seeing someone or you ever name-drop an ex or that you think the barista was cute, he freaks out. And if he likes you more than a friend, he might try to hide his true feelings or tell you that guy is a jerk and not nearly good enough for you because, in his eyes, the only guy who will ever be good enough for you is him.
24. He remembers what you tell him
We pay attention to the people and things we’re interested in. So if he’s listening to what you say and remembering it, it means he’s interested. Especially if it’s random, minute details like that one time a baby elephant hosed you in water on holiday in Sri Lanka or that pair of gorgeous Jimmy Choos you spotted in the window the other day and said you liked.
On the other hand, if you’ve told him you have a major allergy to strawberries and he invites you out strawberry-picking, you’re probably just friends and not even that close.
25. He touches you (but not in a creepy way)
When a man likes you romantically, he will want to be as close to you as possible without coming across as weird, needy, aggressive, or creepy. So maybe he gives you a high five, a hug, or brushes a strand of hair away from your face. He is physically drawn to you like a honey bee to a flower.
26. He’s protective of you
Does he instinctively put his arm out in front of you if you’re crossing a busy street and he’s worried you’re about to jump into traffic? Does he stand up for you if someone is giving you a hard time or being rude? Does he stay up and call you when he knows you’re out late to ensure you get back safe?
When a guy likes a girl, he will instinctively go out of his way to protect her.
27. Other friends think something’s going on between you
Are both of your friends constantly asking if something’s going on between you, telling you to hurry up and date already, or saying you’ll end up married in ten years? Your closest friends are likely to spot it if real feelings are involved, even if you’re oblivious to it!
What to do if he likes you more than a friend
If you’re certain that he likes you more than a friend, you’ve got two options.
If you like him more than a friend too
This is great! A study by the University of Texas found that 40% of couples were friends first before they started dating, and we all know how well that ended up for Monica & Chandler on Friends.
The next step is to sit down and have an honest conversation. You could wait for him to bring it up, or if you’re feeling brave, you can make the first move. Discuss how you’ll handle things if dating doesn’t work – will you be able to salvage a friendship? How important is your friendship to you?
If he’s just a friend to you
If you know in your heart there’s no way this guy could be any more than a friend to you, then do your best not to give him any mixed signals or false hope, and don’t take advantage of his feelings toward you.
Prepare for him to declare his feelings to you eventually. Avoid spending too much time one on one. And make a point of mentioning other guys you’re dating so that you’re being clear you’re not interested in pursuing anything with him (don’t do this once he declares his feelings for you because that’s just cruel).
Conclusion
Is there a guy friend in your life, and you’re wondering, “does he like me more than a friend?” Tell me all about it in the comments below!
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