Level Up in Dating and Stop Wasting Your Time

It can be frustrating in a world where swiping right or left can lead to endless matches but still no success in finding your perfect match. You’re putting in all this effort, yet you’re still single. How the heck are you supposed to keep going?

The truth is, if you’re not seeing the results you want, don’t give up just yet. In this blog post, I’ll be sharing my best tips on how you can level up in dating, and finally find that long-lasting love that you’ve been searching for.

Get Clear on Non-negotiables:

Before you start swiping, take some time to figure out what you’re truly looking for in a partner. This means understanding your own deal-breakers aka non-negotiables. 

These are not the superficial qualities in a partner, like someone’s height or status. Instead, they are core values you must have aligned with a partner to have a happy and healthy relationship. For example, if you want to have a family, you can’t have half a child (so there is no negotiation). 

In my Conscious Dating programs, I show you how to make your list of non-negotiables. Usually, there are about 10 to 15 in total. Any more or less may be somewhat concerning. 

When you have a clear understanding of what you want in a partner, you’ll be more selective in who you choose to date, and you’ll have a higher chance of finding someone compatible with you.

Quality Over Quantity:

It’s not about the number of matches you have, it’s about the quality of those matches. 

Instead of swiping right on people based only on their looks, take the time to read their profiles and see if they align with what you’re looking for. 

If they took the time to write something meaningful on their profile, consider this a quality match. If there is barely isn’t anything on their profile (swipe left), this shows you their level of commitment to dating and wanting to find a relationship. 

Paying attention to these small details will save you time in the long run, as you won’t waste your time on dates that were never going to work out.

Don’t Settle for Anything Less Than What You Deserve:

It’s easy to settle for someone who’s “good enough” just so you can avoid being single. But don’t do it. 

If your match is giving off some weird “hook up” vibes, listen to your gut and just unmatch. It’s important not to gaslight yourself in these situations and trust your intuition more. 

Believe and know that someone kind will be respectful and is out there looking for you. This attitude helps you level up your self-respect. Remember, you teach people how to treat you. 

You deserve to be with someone who truly makes you happy, and who you can see a future with. Even if the chemistry is off the charts, learn how to say NO to what you don’t want to make room for what you DO want. 

Don’t settle for anything less than that, even if it means being single for a little longer.

If you’re struggling to find places to meet people on your level, watch the video below (article continues below).

Invest in Yourself:

Often insecurity can cause singles to settle for less. Thinking that they have to take what they can get or they will be single for the rest of their life. 

Thinking like this is a self-fulfilling prophecy. There is such a thing called confirmation bias, where our mind looks for confirmation of existing beliefs.  

Break this thinking pattern by being happy and fulfilled in your own life. The more you level up in your own life and do not need a relationship to complete you, the more you will level up in what you attract. 

Pursue your own goals, hobbies, and passions. Go to an adult music camp, join a co-ed dodgeball team, or just pick something to help you play and have fun again!

Not only will this make you a more interesting person, but it will also increase your self-confidence. Like attracts like. You’ll draw in the type of partner you have always desired!

Be the Chooser:

Just because someone is attracted to you and wants to settle down right away does not mean the are a good fit for you. Often singles jump too quickly in a relationship without really screening their potential partners enough. 

And by the time they realize this person is not a good fit for them, they have already spent months or even years investing in the relationship, desperately trying to keep things going. 

I say NO to that! Slow down the dating process, and screen your partner for your non-negotiables, core values, priorities, and more. This process should take several months before you can even say you both are really a good fit. 

Time is your friend, and it will help you choose someone that will last a lifetime rather than fill a void in the relationship. 

Remember, your time is precious, so don’t waste it on people who aren’t worth your effort. It may be a slower process to screen, but the results are more long-lasting. Keep your standards high, and trust that the right person will come along at the right time.