The Best Dating Advice for Introverted Men

Dating when you’re an introverted man can be a bit nuanced. Whether you’ve been single for a period of time or just recently decided you’re open to dating, putting yourself out there can understandably feel a bit intimidating at first. Happily, we’re here to share some tips so you can navigate dating in the best way possible!

As an introverted man, you are unique in the best way. You are kind, thoughtful, and logical. Play to your strengths and you’ll attract a woman who is a wonderful complement to you as a man. Below are the top 10 tips for dating advice for introverted men.

1. Know what you’re looking for in a woman

Have you ever heard that it’s best to avoid grocery shopping while hungry or without a list? The same can be true for dating. If you don’t know what you’re looking for, you may end up “overspending” your energy on many dates as you try to find a great match, or you may even become frustrated when you aren’t making lasting connections. Curate a list of what your ideal qualities are in a woman and start there. When you know exactly what it is you’re looking for, you’re more likely to find it!

2. Be realistic

As you create your list of what you’re looking for in a woman, be mindful of what you write down. If you are extremely specific, chances are you will be challenged to find someone who fits your exact specifications. A 5’7” brunette who enjoys art, kickboxing, and Indian cuisine can rule out many potentially amazing matches before you get the chance to meet them, for example. Consider a well-rounded mix of qualities that have to do with her character, physical presentation, and hobbies.. Some examples could include that she…

• Has a kind personality
• Enjoys giving back to others
• Has a warm smile, and
• Enjoys travel and outdoor activities.

You may even want to consider some non-negotiables, such as religious beliefs, desire to have children (or not!), and career aspirations. Whatever you decide to include on your list, make sure you’re being realistic! On that same note, it’s also important that you meet the same qualities that you are looking for. If you are looking for someone who is bilingual while you only speak one language, that wouldn’t be a realistic bullet point to add to your list.

3. Try online dating

Online dating is a wonderful way to put yourself out there as you navigate the dating scene. Having control over when and where you engage with interested women will help you to relax and be yourself. It also provides you with ample time to create a thoughtful response to each message before sending it. Use this as an opportunity to see who’s out there and practice flirting! When you connect with someone who catches your interest, you can then ask her to meet you for an in-person date.

4. Be yourself

While this may seem like an obvious piece of advice, it’s important to allow yourself to relax and be genuine. Whether you’re flirting over text or in-person with a woman, don’t try to be someone you’re not. You want her to know you for who you truly are, and she will appreciate the fact that you portray yourself in an honest way! Your introverted nature will be a refreshment to the women who are compatible with you. For encouragement, take a look at some of the wonderful qualities unique to introverted men!

5. Practice approaching women and initiating conversation

Perhaps you’re out with your guy friends and find yourself in a position to initiate a conversation with a woman who catches your eye. Go up and talk to her! While it’s understandable to feel a little nervous, do your best to relax and think of situations like these as practice. Approaching dating as a skill to master can take the pressure off and help you to be more comfortable in the moment. The more you practice, the easier it will become! Before you know it, you’ll be able to approach women and initiate a conversation with ease.

6. Put in the effort

The best way to show someone you’re interested is to care. When she’s speaking, make eye contact and truly listen to what she’s saying. You may learn that sushi is her favorite food, and then you could use that information to plan a date at a local sushi restaurant. When you show that you care, she will be more likely to open up to you so you can truly get to know her.

7. Be well-groomed and approachable

Women are attracted to men who put thoughtfulness into their appearance. When you are dressed nicely and looking well-groomed, you are much more approachable. Before going on a date or a night out with your friends, practice some self-care by getting a haircut, shaving, or wearing a nice blazer you bought last fall. When you look good, you feel your best and portray a confident vibe that makes women want to come up and talk to you! 

8. Be a gentleman!

Women appreciate a man who knows how to be chivalrous. When you’re out with a woman, you can be a gentleman by holding the door open for her as you’re walking into a restaurant or offering your jacket to her if the weather gets a bit chilly. A small gesture can speak volumes about who you are as a man. 

9. Have go-to conversation topics ready

While awkward silences in conversation are completely normal, the good news is that they don’t have to derail the interaction. When you come prepared with topics to talk about, the likelihood of a lull in the conversation will diminish significantly. (This is especially helpful when you’re introverted and may take a little while to warm up!) Maybe you’ve recently watched an intriguing documentary or have just read a captivating book. Talk about what you’re interested in and get to know her interests, too!

10. Don’t get discouraged!

Dating is a skill that takes a lot of practice. The truth is, everyone has felt rejection at some point in their life. There will be winning moments and there will be some moments where you may feel like you didn’t get the outcome you were hoping for. Give yourself the room to learn and grow and not take each disappointment personally! Rejection is a normal part of dating that everyone experiences from time to time.

Final thoughts on dating advice for introverted men

Today, we discussed helpful tips to approaching dating as an introverted man that can be summed up in the following few points…

• Be yourself, 
• Embrace that practice makes perfect, and
• Be prepared

Follow these tips and you’ll be more confident than ever as you head into your next date!

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Introverted Alpha has been helping smart introverted men attract women naturally since 2014. This powerful woman-led team has been featured in Business Insider, Forbes, Entrepreneur, AskMen, Men’s Fitness, and many more. Introverted Alpha is best known for its gentle, logical advice perfect for the introverted man to improve his dating and social life and his confidence.