Who Should Confirm the Date? 5 Ways to Know and What to Say

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Picture this: You’ve made dinner plans with a woman you’re interested in and the day finally rolls around, yet neither of you have contacted the other. You’re left wondering if the date is still on, who should confirm the date, and whether or not you should text first. Sound familiar?

It’s safe to say that we’ve all been in a situation like this at some point in our dating lives. Happily, there are some easy tips you can use to feel confident navigating this area of dating once and for all.! Today, we will discuss five ways to know who should confirm the date and what to say.

1. Reach out to her first

Generally, women anticipate that the man will confirm the date. While you might be sitting around waiting for a text from her, chances are she’s doing the same. Reaching out to a woman first is chivalrous and shows her that you are interested in her and comfortable leading as the man. 

2. Be straightforward

When reaching out to confirm your date via text, make sure you’re straightforward so that plans aren’t left up for interpretation. For example, if you send a text asking, “Are we still on for tomorrow?”, it can possibly leave some confusion around the location, time, and logistics of the event itself, as well as potentially come across as insecure

Offering a bit more detail and confidence in your text ensures that you both are on the same page and excited to meet up, which is so helpful! Consider sending this instead: “Hi [NAME]! I’m looking forward to our date at Simpatico tomorrow at 7pm. I can’t wait to see you!”

As you can see, this second text offers extra information while still being short, sweet, and confident. If she can’t make the date, she can reply and say so! There’s no need to ask for her confirmation explicitly unless you haven’t heard from her and the time for the date is drawing near, within a few hours or so. Now you both are clear on the date, time, location, and the fact that you are meeting at the venue as opposed to you picking her up, which is ideal for a first date from online. Otherwise, picking her up is a wonderfully chivalrous gesture that a thoughtful woman will so appreciate!

3. Consider the timing

While you may be excited for the date many days in advance, wait to send that confirmation text until the morning or midday prior. You may inadvertently seem too eager, and last-minute matters can occasionally come up! You also don’t want to leave plans up in the air, either. That’s why sending her a text the day before the date to confirm is perfect.

4. Let her know you’re looking forward to your date

Once you’ve confirmed your date, let her know you’re thinking about her the morning of the date by sending a quick text saying exactly that. Perhaps you’re going out to one of your favorite Italian restaurants for dinner, and you can’t wait to share your hidden gem with her. You can opt for a flirty text like, “I’m going to be thinking about the spaghetti and red wine tonight all day long! And thinking of you too, even more! ;)” If you’d prefer a more casual option, you can send something like, “I can’t wait to show you my favorite Italian spot tonight! Here’s the address in case you need it. See you at 7pm!” 

5. Be gracious if something comes up

On occasion, something last-minute may come up where she isn’t able to make it to the date. Perhaps her boss asked her to work late on an important project, or maybe her dog got sick and she had to take him to the vet. While it’s normal to feel a twinge of disappointment when that happens, it’s important to respond with grace and respect. This shows her that you are a true gentleman, and also that you are understanding and flexible.

If she responds letting you know that she isn’t able to make it, be sure to wish her well with whatever situation popped up and let her know you are still interested in rescheduling. You can say something like…

  • “I completely understand about the project deadline, and I admire your work ethic. Would you like to reschedule for next Friday instead? You can tell me all about it then!”, or
  • “I’m sorry to hear about your puppy. I hope he feels better soon. Text me when he’s on the mend and we can reschedule our date!”

Conclusion to who should confirm the date

Next time you’re left wondering if you should hit “send” on that confirmation text, be sure to consider the following…

  • Is this message straightforward?
  • Am I sending confirmation too early?
  • If she needs to cancel, am I being kind and gracious in my reply?

If you know what to say and when to say it, you can easily confirm a date with confidence!

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Introverted Alpha has been helping smart introverted men attract women naturally since 2014. This powerful woman-led team has been featured in Business Insider, Forbes, Entrepreneur, AskMen, Men’s Fitness, and many more. Introverted Alpha is best known for its gentle, logical advice perfect for the introverted man to improve his dating and social life and his confidence.

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