Dating

Women Want Men To Be Vulnerable But Get Turned Off When They Are

April 28, 2024

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Women Want Men To Be Vulnerable But Get Turned Off When They Are

Today, we’ll look at a common struggle between men and women: why women want men to be vulnerable but get turned off when they are.

Women say they want their men to open up, share their thoughts and feelings, ask for help, and be vulnerable.

However, when a man often lets his guard down in any of these areas, the woman becomes agitated, cold, aloof, sexually unresponsive, bossy, or even mean.

No wonder men and women are confused by each other’s behaviours.

Why on earth does a woman think she wants something and then she reacts in such unloving ways when she gets it?

Believe it or not, there’s a LOGICAL explanation men will understand.

It’ll be helpful to start with a typical situation exemplifying this misunderstanding as was written in the comments of my Attachment video.

In the video, I provide some general information on what women experience as strong vs weak vulnerability, then see how that info applies to this fella’s situation.

See if you can spot what the couple are misunderstanding about each other.

He writes:

So, my issue is that I struggle to discuss my problems and weaknesses with her. I fear that women generally prefer strong men, and I worry that opening up about my vulnerabilities would make me seem unattractive to her. However, she frequently talks about her own problems and urges me to do the same.

A few days ago, she expressed frustration that I was unwilling to admit my problems or accept help. I maintained my silence, stating that I preferred to handle my issues on my own because I felt she already had enough to deal with. In response, she commented that facing one’s problems is a sign of maturity, implying that I was immature for not doing so. I countered by explaining that not burdening others with my problems didn’t mean I wasn’t aware of them.

Since then, we haven’t spoken for three days. This isn’t uncommon; she often enters periods of silence without explanation. When we eventually do resume communication, she typically cites something I have said or done—or sometimes, what I haven’t done—as the reason for her silence.

In situations like these, I’m unsure how to proceed. I feel like we both are fearful-avoidant type. Should I simply initiate a conversation and break the silence? I worry that doing so might make me appear weak and reinforce the idea that I’ll always come back and she will not respect me…

Watch the video to find out what this couple is misunderstanding about each other and a simple solution.

Watch the full video here or click below.