How To Get Back Out There

137
Karen Belz

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Back in the day, you might have felt a little embarrassed about being 50 and single again. It can make one feel undateable or unlovable, but this is the furthest thing from the truth.

While your parents may have stuck together no matter what, divorce is more common than you think and a reality of life is that marriages and partnerships can and do come to an end. It’s okay if you don’t get it right the first time. Not too many people do.

However, if the split is fresh, you may feel a little intimidated. The dating world has changed so much since you were last out there. Being 50 and single again might make you feel very alone, especially if your closest friends are still paired up.

But the truth is, the people who are dearest to you just want you to be happy. Here’s how to take the steps to meet someone new when you feel ready to. 

Get Back into the Dating Game When You’re 50 and Single Again 

Talk to your friends

It’s possible your friends have someone wonderful they can set you up with. It’s an old-fashioned method, but one of the best. Just think, your potential date already comes with recommendations.

Even the experts agree. Psychology Today writes, “It turns out that sometimes our friends, family, and colleagues might know us better than we know ourselves. Maybe it is time to ask them”.

Set up an online dating profile

You might be a little intimidated, but online dating is a lot more popular now than it was a few decades ago. Also, there are specific dating sites for over 50s that may be more appealing and user-friendly.

Immerse yourself in a new hobby

This is beneficial for plenty of reasons. But for one, it’s a great way to meet new people. Reader’s Digest even suggests checking out places like community colleges and craft stores to see if there’s anything special being offered. “If you have an idea for an interest you’d like to pursue, look for a related class,” they write. “If you don’t, browse offerings to see what sounds fun. Taking a one-time class is an easy, and usually inexpensive, way to try something out”.  

If you happen to connect with someone who had the same idea, the two of you already have one major thing in common.

Remind yourself that this is an all-new experience

Back when you were in your 20’s, you were looking for someone completely different. Now, you’re more mature. You have better judgment as to who you want to spend your life with. If you keep thinking back to bad dates you had decades ago, you’ll battle to gain the courage to put yourself out there now. 

There are plenty of other people who are in your shoes. They’re scared about moving forward and feel a little anxious about taking that step too. Being 50 and single again isn’t as rare as you may think. Consider it a good icebreaker to lightly and politely chat about these feelings and emotions together on your first date.

Take it slow

If you’re fresh out of a messy divorce, you’ll need some time to heal. Yes, it’s possible to find love again — but first, you’ll want to make sure you’re not projecting any of your past hurt onto a new partner. Your divorce will have an impact on your life. It’s something big that happened that was likely pretty painful. 

When you’re 50 and single again, the last thing you want to do is waste time and break hearts when you’re not officially ready to move forward. Only you know the best time to resume your love life. Waiting until you are healed and ready for a healthy relationship is the best thing you can do.

 Have fun with it

You’ll meet some people you connect with, and others you won’t. If it takes a long time to find someone you have chemistry with, don’t get discouraged. You should be going into dates with the mindset that you’re having an adventure, and not approach it like a chore or obstacle.

It’ll help take some pressure off the whole situation. Remember, you’re fine on your own. You don’t need someone to complete you. But, having a partner is nice as well.

It may feel a little intimidating to be 50 and single again, but if you put time into finding your next partner, you’ll succeed. Dating may look different, but it’s not as scary as it used to be. As a mature adult, you know exactly what you’re looking for in a partner. And, there are plenty of people in the same boat as you who’d love to make you happy. 

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