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3 Reasons Why Men Don’t Call You Back in The Over 50’s Dating Game
Sometimes you have the best 1st date.
You spend hours talking.
He gives you a hug or a kiss when you leave and says he’ll call you.
As you head home, you’re excited because you think he just might be the one.
Then the days start going by and he hasn’t called back to ask you out again.
Why does this happen? I’m going to explain 3 Reasons why in today’s blog.
Reason #1 . . . You might appear too needy or desperate in his eyes
Susie came to me because she was having the hardest time getting second dates.
She felt like she could tell whether or not he was the one within minutes of meeting.
If he seemed like he had potential, she’d start fantasizing about their future life together.
She imagined what it would look like when they moved in together.
Of what good time they’d have if they vacationed at one of their favorite places.
So stirred up by these mental images, she’d find herself telling him they should make plans for future Saturday night dates that might be fun to do together.
And that was the moment when men would start winding down the date.
What Susie was doing was planning a relationship that didn’t exist.
Her future planning came across as “desperate for a relationship” which sent up HUGE RED FLAGS to the men she was meeting.
When you start making his life your life before you’ve gotten to know a man, you’ll never get a second date.
It’s better to slow down and get to know someone first.
Also, allow him to pursue you when you know he’s interested.
Reason #2 . . . Having sex with a new man too quickly
My client Ellen, met a man and the chemistry was hot.
The sparks were sizzling between the two of them.
The date was coming to an end and she didn’t really want it to end.
Her hormones were in overdrive as he walked her to her car.
Once there, they started kissing and things heated up as both of them got more and more turned on.
Next thing she knew, they were in the back seat of her car having sex.
She said they were both both on fire and it felt so good and so right.
When it was over, he kissed her good-bye, said he had a great time and never called her again.
She was devastated thinking the two of them had this amazing bond.
And they did momentarily.
The problem was the sex was too easy for him to get.
Men like to pursue you and they will push your boundaries to see how far they can get with you.
A man respects you when you stick to your boundaries.
It’s why it’s so important to know what your boundaries are before you head out on a date.
I shared with Ellen that it was ok to have 1st Date sex and to not beat herself up for this choice because sometimes those hormones do take over.
But most of the time, 1st date sex rarely leads to a relationship.
Reason #3 … You’re Just NOT His Type
You probably have an idea in your head of who you want to spend the rest of your life with, right?
This is your type and its who you’re looking for when you scan men’s pictures on a dating site.
You’re trying to see if a man fits the picture of this idea in your head.
Men do this too and when you match the picture of who they think they want that’s when they reach out to you.
After a couple of emails are exchanged, he calls you and you’re feeling like it’s going really well.
He starts talking about the future saying things like “we’ll have to try out the latest Japanese restaurant together in your area since you love sushi so much.”
What he’s doing is talking out loud to see how you might fit into their world.
Always take this type of talk with a grain of salt.
His picture is working overtime as he future talks . . . thinking you might be the one.
It doesn’t mean you are.
But . . . you get excited thinking he might be right for you, too!
Then the two of you meet.
Within minutes he’s decided you aren’t a match to his picture so the second date doesn’t happen.
It’s not personal.
It’s just the pictures . . . the one in his head and the one you turn out to be don’t match.
You’re just NOT his type.
Just like a lot of men you go out with don’t match your picture so you say NO to a second date.
Save yourself a lot of date analysis and evaluation by not taking a 1st date personally and by not being invested in its outcome.
Just go out there with the intention of meeting someone new and interesting.
It will make dating a lot more fun for you.
Lisa, I’m Engaged!!!!!
Lisa…I wanted to let you know I’ve been dating an amazing man and we recently got engaged. The process and guidance you provided was instrumental in me meeting him. He’s a kind, generous, adoring, adventurous, stable and amazing man who adores me every day. I don’t think I would have been prepared to meet him without going through your program, and believe me I didn’t always comply or agree with you but I did it anyway. Your program really works Lisa and it had all the tools I needed to find my guy. I’m 61 and believe that true love is an option for anyone. Kathy, California
Always Believing in YOU!!!!
Hugs~
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