10 Ways a Marriage Is Different After Children

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10 Ways a Marriage Is Different After Children


Regardless of your parenting stage, whether your child is an infant, toddler, preschooler, school goer, or teenager, you are bound to contend with higher stress levels than before. Parenting signs you up for more responsibilities which leads to heightened levels of stress not only in your personal life but in your marriage too.

This is because although raising children is a very fulfilling venture, it is not all rainbows and unicorns. You have a flurry of responsibilities nipping at your heels. You have to ensure your kids are safe and protected, provided for, disciplined, given a decent education and healthcare, and loved, among many other responsibilities.   

5. You May Feel Resentful Towards Your Spouse

Before you had kids, your worlds revolved around each other. You fueled the flame in your marriage through date nights, lunch dates, lazy evening walks, movies, road trips, picnics, and other sizzling activities. 

But now you have one or more little humans who depend on you for everything. You love them to bits alright, but caring for them has taken a toll on your marriage. When this happens, spouses often start feeling resentful towards each other. 

The wife may, for instance, become preoccupied with tending to the kids. This may make the husband feel ignored and he may resort to immersing himself deeper in his work. This drives a wedge into the relationship and breeds resentment. 

6. “Me-Time” Goes out the Window

Let’s be honest, we all need some time away from our spouses to recharge and recuperate. Studies show that taking time off alone fuels couples’ fulfillment and relieves stress. When spouses take time to sit with their thoughts and revel in something they love (alone) they show up for the marriage with a spring in their step. “Me-time” also helps ignite creativity. 

Some alone time ideas for women include taking a hot bath, reading, getting a manicure/pedicure, massage, working out, and meditating. Guys too need to crawl into their caves once in a while. They may indulge in activities such as playing or watching a sport, taking a long drive, reading, and catching up with the boys. 

When kids grace your marriage, you have oodles of responsibilities in a cutthroat competition for your time. This is especially true when the kids are young. You barely have time to vacuum the carpet, let alone pore over your favorite book.

Having little to no time to revel in the things that perk you up can negatively impact your marriage. You may become grumpy and be unable to be the happy-go-lucky girl or dude your partner once knew.  

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